Manning Point Bowling Club Admissions Policy

By  Lenny Livebait

The Greater Manning Council AGM minutes recently released have shed light on the perptually shady admissions policy of the Manning Point Bowling Club.

In an unanimous decision, all councillors voted to allow the short, balding, rotund local authority figure to tighten his admission requirements even further.

In documents tendered as evidence, the short, balding rotund local authority figure drew attention to the number of invading tourists which were anticipated during the forth coming fishing tournament planned for late March.

This is of particular concern, as a recent venture to his facility - in early October 2007 - saw Stillwater Steve forcibly ejected for what is widely considered acceptable drunken behaviour. Stillwater Steve was unavailable for comment on this latest empire building development. As a direct result of this action, it is disappointing to note that neither Gaffa Gort or Jag 'em Jimmy will be available for the tournament.

Sources however, suggest that the final dispute, resulting in the ejection of Mr Stillwater was over the fine print contained within the Keno Rules. It is this correspondents strong recommendation that the short, balding, rotund local authority figure may be allowed to insert all Keno tickets, and in fact all objects into cavities under his control of his own volition.

Attempts to insert objects into his cavities will almost definately result in immediate eviction under the new council policy.


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